My Obsession

I longed to be skinny, light, free of all insecurities. My eating habits disgust me. I wish i were accepted. I hate how I look. I'm tired of being just average. I want to look like that one girl. I want him to think I'm perfect and tell me how beautiful i look today. I want to smile and know that he is being sincere. I'm walking the path of self-destruction. Starving to become someone distant but admired secretly by the girls who wishfully want that but don't have the will power. I want to be that girl they look up too. Strong from the inside but weak and feeble from the outer. I don't want to crave no longer food but thinness. I want my bones to show, be light as a petal, and swayed along with the blowing of the wind.